Five Times Merlin Told Arthur About His Magic
by glenien
Summary: AU!Episode 1x10  Coda , five times Merlin tells Arthur about his magic.. and other things.


**Five Times Merlin Told Arthur About His Magic**

**01.**

Two bodies were lying oppositely on the same mattress, sharing their heat back to back. The candle was long killed and the silence was deep in the dark room, except for deep slumbering breaths and few crackles of the half-dead fire's flames. But Merlin shortly found out that he couldn't stand it, he just couldn't anymore.

"Arthur?" he whispered suddenly, before he could stop himself.

"Hm?" answered a half sleepy voice, "What is it?"

The dark haired young man sat upright, trying to figure out the shape of the other one, by squeezing his eyes. He swallowed and spoke with a lowered voice, "Do you trust me?"

A deep voice responded in a seriously amused way. "No, of course. You're awful with a sword."

Merlin tried not to laugh like a hysteric. Wide awake now, he hugged his knees to his chest and scrubbed his face feverishly. "No- I mean..." But what did he _really_ mean?

Arthur sighed and turned over towards to him, his eyes finally crooked open. "Why are you asking me this?" he murmured, "You know that I do."

"I've- I've got to tell you something." His voice became a bare whisper in the end.

Maybe that got the prince's attention, maybe it was the fear, or the ultimate terror in it, because Arthur suddenly straightened up on his elbows, his face dissolved into a frown, looked up to him. "Go on."

Now that the moment of the absolute truth have come, Merlin found out that he no longer had the voice nor the courage to expose it. He was struggling badly, his stare was kept to his hands, unable to face those eyes in front of him.

But if he can not trust Arthur with his magic, how _can he _trust him with his life?

"I-" Merlin stammered, "I-"

A rustling of clothes, and some shifting towards the end, Merlin felt the body next to him moving and sitting up. Then finally a hand, much larger than his, came out of nowhere and caught his.

He only dared one glance up and saw a pair of clear blue eyes shining seriously. "You know you can trust me with anything, don't you Merlin?"

His servant swallowed, "It's very hard to tell. It's a secret that I've been keeping for such a long time."

"Did you do something?" The prince's voice was worried now.

"I-" A half-laugh escaped from him, "I was kind of born with it."

"What is it, a disease? Are you telling me _now?_" gasped Arthur, but Merlin noticed that the man did not let go of his hand and he couldn't help but smile a little.

"Depends on how you look at it, I suppose." He answered shakily.

Arthur brought himself impossibly even closer to him, Merlin felt their legs and knees intertwining and their bodies touching everywhere, but Arthur didn't seem to mind at all, he was looking right into his traitorous eyes.

"Merlin just tell me, I won't eat you." Arthur vowed, a small smile of cheekiness playing in the corner of his lips, "I promise."

Merlin looked deeply into those sky blue eyes, seeking and inquiring them. Arthur seemed to understand that this challenge would be his one and only judgement, and did not flinch back, not even for one second, he hold the gaze like he was holding a sword in the battlefield and he squezed Merlin's hand harder.

They seemed to froze like that, forever. The tension was slowly changing to something entirely else and Merlin felt that unnamed power drawing him to Arthur. Slowly, very slowly, his eyes turning downwards to those chappy-looking lips, he was already feeling the sharp pain in his chest, would he be rejected, knowing that the last words to end his life would be also out of those lips… the ones he adored and worshipped with every inch of his soul.

Breathing hard and shallow, he was almost sharing the same air when he stole it from Arthur and he leaned to whisper, "I'm magic," to his lips and he kissed them.

**02.**

He never saw Arthur this stressed. He seemed to carry the already fought and lost battle on his shoulders and Merlin had to give him the courage to be himself, to be the future mighty king.

"All you need to do is get them ready for battle," he continued passionately, "The rest… will take care of itself."

The denial was clear on Arthur's exclamation."How?"

Merlin opened his mouth to argue more his point, but saw the ultimate despair in those sky blue eyes.

He swallowed. "Arthur I've got to tell you something." Suddenly aware of his surroundings, Merlin looked back and saw his mother leaving the kitchen, he grabbed Arthur's arm and pulled him inside.

"What- what's going on?" bewildered, Arthur questioned him.

Leaning over the wooden table Merlin turned up his face to him. "There is something about me that I couldn't tell you before."

Perplexed, Arthur looked at him, clear confusion written in his face. "You're going to tell me now?"

"Yes," was the only response Merlin could give him, before adding for a good measure, "But only if you promise to listen to the end. I want you to know that I never intented to harm you or any of your people, ever."

"I-" Arthur looked like he wanted to ask millions of questions but saw his servant's determined face and his tone changed, "I promise."

A tense silence passed through the moment, before Merlin took a big breath and exclaimed, "I'm magic."

"What-?" Arthur's eyes boggled.

"I'm magical. I'm a warlock, a wizard, a sorcerer. I _can_ do magic," stressed Merlin.

The prince stared to him for one moment, then slowly, very slowly his expression changed from neutral to a very painful one before he bursted out. Laughing. Aloud.

Merlin gaped at him.

Arthur continued to giggle for almost one full minute before he wiped tears from his eyes and sighed, "Ah, for that one second I _really_ believed you."

Merlin's expression was scandalous. "You don't believe me!"

"Don't be ridiculous Merlin. That was a fine joke, really." Arthur was still smiling and his eyes were shining with that stupid humour.

Merlin felt like watermelons thrown in his face, repeatedly. He was extremely annoyed. "I'm not joking you big prat, I'm telling you the truth!"

"Right," Arthur snorted and straightened up. "Come on Merlin, we have serious things to do, like to prepare for the battle, you know?"

Merlin crossed his arms. "Oh really? And how are you going to fight without your pants?" He looked pointedly to Arthur's pants, and whispered out loud, "_Devertium!_"

A golden light shined in the warlock's eyes, and Arthur gasped, his pants loosened and fallen to his knees.

Merlin raised one brow. "I told you I wasn't joking."

Arthur was staring open mouthed in shock. "You- you-" he managed to stammer and he made a grap for his pants, tripped and almost fell. His eyes were wild.

Merlin suddenly felt extremely guilty and approached to help. He was already fastening the pants in their rightful place and getting up, before Arthur could even squeak in protest. "Look- I'm sorry- I just-.."

"SORRY?" cried Arthur and Merlin cringed, "You- UTTER- MORON!" Arthur's finger was now poking him hard in his chest, "How did you EVEN managed to keep THAT from me?"

Merlin tried warily for a crooked smile, "You're not? Angry?"

"Of course I am angry!" exclaimed the Prince, frantically marching up and down in the room, "I am extremely angry- in fact- shocked!"

Merlin gulped, "I- I really am not evil."

"I know!" Arthur was laughing now, again, but entirely in an insane way, "You're a dumb- clumsy- idiot!" He was gesturing with his hands as he said, "You're Merlin!" like it explained everything.

Merlin tried to reason with him. "It's- just a gift really."

Arthur suddenly turned to him, "Do that again!"

"You want me to take off your pants?" Merlin didn't think he'd cause his prince to lost his mind.

Arthur rolled his eyes. "No you idiot- the- magic!"

Dumbfounded, Merlin looked around the kitchen and saw a broom lying in the corner. He summoned it.

Arthur was bewildered. "Absolutely amazing!"

A slow, happy grin started to form. "Really?" asked Merlin.

"It's such a bless that an idiot like you can just _do_ it!" announced Arthur with a shrill.

The smile wiped out. "Look, can we lay down idiot part just a bit?"

But the blond one wasn't listening to him, he was too busy having an euphoria. "You were telling the truth all the time! It was you who saved Gwen's father!" exclaimed Arthur, "And- me!" He paused. "With doing magic. Many times."

Merlin immediately cut in. "Also saving your life, like many times. Let us not forget it." The frown on Arthur's face showed every procession of that information and Merlin felt like it was time to walk on his knees. "Don't execute me. Please?"

Arthur shook his head, still looking a little bewildered. "I- no, of course I _won't_-" he dropped it there and turned to face Merlin with a serious look, "Is there anything else you kept from me?" he demanded with a firm voice.

Merlin faltered, "Er- nothing- major?"

"Are you sure?" insisted Arthur, his eyes were burning holes into Merlin's.

"Not really.." Merlin gulped and shook his head when he started approach to him with an intimidating manner.

"It's a very big secret, Merlin."

"Y-yes."

"That _you_ shouldn't kept from me. Don't you agree?"

"I- yes, Sire." Merlin blabbed, backing up into the corner.

"So I have to tell you one too," interrupted Arthur and Merlin couldn't help but stare a little.

He saw a little smile playing on the Prince's face, but the expression sobered quickly. "I know you've must heard it from girls, but I wanted to say it myself," continued Arthur with a serious voice, "I came here for you. Not for the fight.. It's saddening me to admit it, but not for the villagers either," added Arthur, looking down and sighed, "I just didn't want you to be alone in this."

Merlin could not tear his gaze away from that face. "I- can take care of myself…" he stammered.

A crooked smile showed on Arthur's face. "Well, I guess you can."

"You're really not afraid of it?" Merlin whispered.

This time, it was a full smile, "It fits you, somehow," responded Arthur, looking right to him, "I always knew something was different with you." He shrugged. "Just didn't know what that was." His expression seemed suddenly saddened. He gave him another half-smile, half-salute, then turned to leave.

Suddenly Merlin understood why he was so full of despair. "Arthur!"

The prince turned towards him. Merlin closed that gap between them in three steps and grabbed that blonde head with both of his hands, kissing him on the lips with all his might.

When he broke it off, he was merely noticing the hands which were clasping to him. "I hope this one was okay with you too?" he barely managed to breathe.

A smile like a ray of sunshine enlightening a cold morning, brightened Arthur's face. "More than okay," he answered and leaned to kiss him back.

**03.**

"Whatever happens out there today, please don't think differently of me."

He could hear a smile in that deep voice, "I won't," answered Arthur, "It's alright to be scared Merlin." He seemed to understand it too much.

Merlin turned to face him. "That's not what I meant."

That puzzled Arthur. "What is it?" he demanded turning to face him fully, "If you've got something to say, now's the time to say it."

He didn't want to wait until this. He'd have to tell him back then. In the beginning. He could have told him ages ago.

But this was his only chance. Before anything happened to any of them and he regretted this moment. But before he could even open his mouth, Arthur's expression changed, like he've read his thoughts from his mind, and quickly, he dismissed, "Not that. You don't have to say _that_. We're not going to die out here today." He suddenly looked up and nailed him with his stare, insisting. "And I meant it when I say '_we'_."

Merlin swallowed and shook his head, "I think I really have to say it... if any case." He breathed out, feeling already choked with the possibility of losing Arthur here, today. Oh no, he couldn't. He wouldn't. He will tear down whole village with his magic if he had to. He should never brought him in here.

But Arthur was here, looking him in the eye and not leaving. "If you have to," murmured the blond one.

"I have to," he responded. Neither of them moved. If Merlin just could stop that stupid prickling in his eyes, he would raise his head and tell him, tell him _exactly_…

"Oh you- stupid- idiot-.." A firm, gloved hand grasped his neck and a hot, fierce mouth smashed down to his, kissing him passionately enough to lift his chin.

He felt those stupid tears falling down to his face, but did not stop kissing Arthur, trying desperately to hold him under that hundred layers of armor.

Arthur suddenly broke it off, shaking him from his shoulders, "Enough with this girly rubbish, Merlin!" His deep voice cracked and he roughly started to wipe out Merlin's face, grasping his chin and trying to squeeze his mouth, which made Merlin laugh and Arthur, intensely red eyed, finally smile.

"Alright now?" Merlin nodded. "So what was that thing you were going to say to me?" he demanded.

Merlin crooked a smile, "I was just going to tell you that we're not going to be slaughtered today out there."

Arthur gave him a smile immensely proud and cocky, "That's the spirit I was looking for."

"Because I will use my magic to defeat them," continued Merlin, without pause, and looked up to him.

Arthur seemed to be frozen in his place.

Merlin simply nodded to him and moved, "Come on, they must be across the river."

**04.**

"Who did that?"

He was wrong. He was all so wrong to even acknowledge it himself, he knew it all along that _this_ was going to happen, this he should have known, but he was too stupid to hope for the opposite. "What?"

The anger was like a black thunder in the prince's voice. "Wind like that doesn't appear from nowhere! I know magic when I see it. One of you made that happen!"

Arthur met his eyes but didn't even suspect him for one second, he was staring down to Will, preparing to accuse him, to execute him even.

"Arthur…" He couldn't not speak anymore, "Arthur…" he called his name, his attention to the truth.

The comprehension dawned to him, the final hit was there in his eyes. He was immediately in denial, "No, it can't be."

"Arthur.." he repeated softly.

"You wouldn't deceive me like that," The blond man throw his sword and his shield to the ground, forgetting all the fact that he was a warrior, and a noble one in that, he roared, "YOU WOULDN'T BETRAY ME!"

The villagers saw the line of trouble and quickly left them alone. Will insisted on staying but Merlin showed him away. This was between him and Arthur.

"What's going on in here?" demanded a shocked Morgana, she and Gwen heard Arthur's cries and ran to them, both looking worried, but the men ignored them.

"Tell me that was a lie," demanded Arthur, "Tell me, Merlin!"

"I did not lie to you," he said.

"But you didn't tell me truth either!" barked Arthur, "I gave a home to you, an ally, my trust, my friendship!"

"I saved your life!" countered Merlin, now angry, "And many times in that! Didn't you ever wonder how you managed to escape from all those evil magic imposed upon you?"

"How could I be sure it wasn't you doing them in the first place!" shouted back Arthur.

"You can't be sure," Merlin told him, now his eyes burning holes, "But you ought to be," he spat and turned to leave.

But Arthur grabbed his sword and followed him to his house like a furious storm cloud, "Don't you ever think you can turn your back on me and leave it like that!" he ranted, "I could kill you right now!"

"Yes, you can," Merlin growled like a dog, "But don't think for one moment I'll go down without a fight!"

"Are you _challenging_ me?" yelled Arthur, rising his sword high.

"Maybe I am!" Merlin turned and stared to him, his knuckles went white.

Arthur looked into his face, guarding that expression of utter fury just for one moment before his anger suddenly seemed to deflate.

"Merlin, Merlin.." he moaned, lowering his sword, he sat on the same rock they shared earlier and grasped his head, "Why didn't you ever tell me anything?"

Merlin was still cross. "Would you ever listen?"

"That's not true," Arthur denied, "I would have listened to you if you ever attempted to tell me this."

"I-" started Merlin, then sighed, "You're right. I just- I was scared," he whispered and bowed his head.

"From- me?" Arthur looked up, "Or my father?"

"From- us, being like this," Merlin murmured, showing between them. He sat next to Arthur. "I didn't want to fight with you."

"I would never harm you, Merlin," A much deeper voice told him, "You should have told me."

The dark haired warlock turned to face him, "I will tell you now," He looked right into his eyes, "I will tell you all of this."

"Maybe it's too late to tell now," Arthur looked hurt, heart broken. "I don't know if I could trust you anymore."

Merlin opened his mouth and closed, unable to say anything to stop Arthur as he raised up, he was leaving him alone, alone and miserable, just like this.

It was, finally over.

But before any of them could do anything, Gwen and Morgana came out of nowhere and grasped both his and Arthur's arms and dragged them back into Merlin's room.

"We will lock you both in here," threatened Morgana as she shut the door, "Until you two talk this out. And I mean it! Talk, Arthur!"

"Morgana!" yelled the Prince, pounding the door uselessly, "Guinevere! I order you to open this door right this instant!"

"I ordered her not to take orders from you Arthur, so shut up!" yelled Morgana's voice from outside and they left.

"I could open the door, if you want me to," murmured Merlin.

"No Merlin, I don't want you to open the door by _magic_," mocked Arthur, angered again, he turned to face him, "See that, that's what I'm talking about! You go around like it's _nothing_, but obviously it's _everything_ about you!" he said furiously, "How did you even managed to hide it all along?"

"I kept it secret," Merlin answered with a tired voice, "Only a very few people really know about me.. My mother, Gaius, Will.." Then a look came to his face, "You won't execute them either too, would you?"

"I don't want to execute anybody!" exclaimed Arthur with an annoyed voice, then he sighed and sat on the bed next to him, the only accommodation in the room. "I wanted you to trust me with something like this."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, "Were you serious when you said you wouldn't trust me anymore?"

Arthur sighed, "Yes I was, but we'll get over this. But you have to tell me everything, from the beginning."

A slow smile seemed to luminate the young man's face, "I could do that."

Arthur eyed him, looking troubled, "How much magic do you have?"

"I don't know," answered Merlin truthfully, "I'm learning everytime you got yourself into trouble."

"Everytime _I_ got into trouble?" exclaimed Arthur. Merlin nodded, quite sure of himself.

The expression on Arthur's face was priceless. "Come here, you-arrogant-!" he attacked him and grabbed him from his head, Merlin gave a cry of laughter and fought hard, but Arthur managed to pin him down to the bed and started to tickle him mercilessly.

Merlin cried out loud, half-laughing, half-begging, "Stop- stop it! Arthur I mean it!"

"What are you going to do to me, warlock?" The clear blue eyes grinned, taunting him like the first time they ever met, "Are you going to magick me down?"

"I could!" cried Merlin, still laughing.

"You won't," smiled Arthur, looking down to him, his eyes were shining with emotion, "You love me," Merlin froze. "Don't you?" demanded Arthur.

"I'm not saying that."

"No lies. No secrets."

"I cannot tell you that."

"You can," whispered Arthur, "You can tell me anything, Merlin. And do anything if you must."

"You-you—" stammered Merlin, but before he could babble anything, Arthur was on top of him, kissing him.

The door opened with a flash and the girls bursted in, "Oh god!"

"Sweet- god- !"

"Er- we thought you were killing each other- very sorry!" squeaked one of them and the door was slammed.

Neither of them ever noticed it. They were kissing like there was no tomorrow or doing a very good pretending of that.

**05.**

The smoke of fire burns his eyes. He no longer cries. He doesn't want to. Will was his first and best friend, even though they grew apart, he still cares.

He can feel people leaving one by one but he doesn't move and neither does Arthur. His presence is like as a solid wall next to him, his deep voice dragging him to the present. "You knew he was a sorcerer didn't you?" the Prince demands, "That's what you were going to tell me."

Merlin hears the open challenge but only thing he feel is a bone-shaking sorrow rising up into him, managing a suitable answer. "Yes," he responds, his voice growing cold and unemotional, remembering Will's last minutes of protection, Will protecting him and his secret and Arthur, his future king, still questioning it, still not worthy of his trust, "It was."

He senses Arthur opening his mouth, but no words comes out of it. Almost like an invisible wall of fire, he radiates denial and anger. But the Prince grits his teeth and waits, waits until everybody else leave and there are only two of them left, before turning to him and hissing, "You- liar!" The clear voice is shaking with fury, "You think I'm an idiot? Why are you still lying to me?"

Merlin doesn't even face him, "I don't know what you're talking about," he whispers, unable to stop his eyes filling once more.

Arthur grabs his shoulders and makes him turn. "Don't waste your friend's sacrifice, Merlin. You may not find another opportunity of my compassion."

One more blink and the tears are trickling down to his cheeks, he knows, but he doesn't care anymore about crying in front of Arthur, "Why did you let me then?" he demands, defiant, "If you knew what I was and going to do, why not stopping me earlier?"

"I wanted you to trust me enough to tell it to me yourself," The disappointment is clear on the blue eyes, "But obviously, I was wrong. I didn't expect William to pay for the mistake."

The warlock closes his eyes in pain and turns towards the fire. A strong hand grasps his shoulder. "It wasn't your fault."

"I could have saved him."

"It wasn't your fault," Arthur repeats firmly and tugs him back, "Come, now. Let him rest in his peace."

Merlin wipes out his face and follows him like a lost puppy. He can feel Will grinning down to him somewhere. A small smile plays in his blotchy face, "Do I still have to explain myself to you?" he demands meekly to Arthur.

The prat doesn't even roll his eyes. "You'll have many time to do that over your chores when we get back," the Prince answers, but he throws a firm arm to his shoulders, patting him soothingly.

Merlin feels that even if they couldn't make a better start, now is a good time to retry it.

**-THE END-**


End file.
